As with any professional service provider, there are many criteria to consider. Most people only ask about availability and price, but there are more important considerations including:
- Training(not all celebrants have a qualification) – whilst a qualification is not a guarantee, it provides some assurance as to the basic knowledge, skills and attitudes of the celebrant. The celebrant must understand any legalities, be a good listener, able to craft the words according to your preferences, be competent at public speaking, and be well-organised. These will all make your event run more smoothly and graciously!
- Personalisation – do you want a ceremony that is unique to you? A skilled celebrant is able to write your ceremony after meeting the people involved and discussing your vision and ideas. Beware the celebrant who brings out example templates, as these suggest s/he uses a standard layout (like a Registry Office) – complete and legal but with little personalisation, so this should be reflected in the price.
- Location– most ceremonies require you to meet with your celebrant during the planning stages. A wedding typically requires at least 2 meetings before the rehearsal. Where is most convenient to meet – near your home or near the venue? Will Skype work well for you? Meeting at the celebrant’s house may give you a bit more of a sense of their style. If location is important to you, add this to your criteria.
- Back-up– as a professional, your celebrant should belong to the Celebrants Association of NZ (CANZ) which has a Code of Ethics, Professional Standards and a complaints procedure. More importantly, what backup is offered if for some reason your celebrant is unavailable on the day. A network of colleagues is a must-have.
- Busyness– You want your celebrant to treat your ceremony with the seriousness it deserves. This doesn’t mean it can’t be relaxed and fun, but rather that your celebrant makes it top priority on the day. So ask how many ceremonies s/he does per day – I do one as that allows me to give it my full attention and presence.
- Fees– celebrant fees usually constitute a small part of the overall budget for an event, so cost is not the best selection criterion. Most ceremonies fall within the range of $300 to $800 reflecting typically 8-12 hours work and the skill and experience of the celebrant. Do check what the fee covers, as there can be additional costs such as travel, rehearsal, and accessories.
- The X-Factor– most people are a little nervous or emotional on the day of a big event like a wedding, a funeral or a naming celebration. You need to be sure that your celebrant will listen to you and fully understand your preferences, so that they can support you appropriately. When you meet, do they put you at ease? Do you “click”? This is probably the most telling criteria of success and one you must not ignore.
Many ceremonies and rituals can be facilitated by any celebrant with appropriate training and skills. I hold the Certificate in Celebrant Studies which is the longest-standing and most reputable celebrant qualification in New Zealand.
People sometimes ask a family member to act as celebrant for a funeral. This can work well, but it is important to recognise the role that the celebrant plays in holding the space for people to begin grieving. Someone who is emotionally close is less able to do this, and may arrest their own grieving in an attempt to support others they care about. A professional celebrant brings many skills to their role, and mostly in an understated way because they appreciate that the ceremony “is not about them”.
To solemnise marriages and civil unions in New Zealand, the celebrant must also have been appointed by the Registrar-General of Births Deaths and Marriages as a Marriage and/or Civil Union Celebrant and be listed in the New Zealand Gazette or on www.bdm.govt.nz. (Note: not all marriage celebrants are authorised to perform civil unions and vice versa). The Registrar-General has laid down quite strict guidelines for the role of the officiating celebrant. Penalties for not abiding by these can lead to the celebrant being deregistered, offending parties being prosecuted, and/or in extreme cases, a marriage or civil union being deemed null and void.
In both cases the couple needs to apply to the Births Deaths and Marriages (BDMCAT) section of the Department of Internal Affairs using an official form. Click this link for the application for a marriage licence
https://www.govt.nz/browse/family-and-whanau/getting-married/get-a-marriage-licence or this link for FAQs and obtaining a licence for a civil union https://www.dia.govt.nz/diawebsite.nsf/c021d9ab485d28b3cc256ab800742a8e/c4b7492c8ac8311ccc25782600163441!OpenDocument.
You need to name your celebrant on the licence application document, as well as the location/s of your ceremony. (Personal note: If choosing me as your celebrant, be careful with the unusual spelling of my first name, ‘Kathrine’ – if spelt incorrectly it does not show in BDM’s list of approved celebrants)
Your licence is valid for three months from the date of issue.
Some people like to plan their own funeral while they are alive, and I am happy to explore options with them in this way.
However, assuming someone has already died, I typically meet with their close family and sometimes special friends. If possible, it is helpful to meet as a group so we can discuss all your preferences together and make collective decisions. This isn’t always possible if some family members live overseas etc, so Skype can be another useful tool. Occasionally, only an executor is involved in the funeral planning with me. My intention always is to honour the voices of all the bereaved. I email ceremony drafts to key people to ensure accuracy and completeness.
I actively maintain a professional network of skilled and experienced celebrants. Should some circumstance occur that prevents me from attending your ceremony, an alternative celebrant will be arranged for you. This is the special benefit of the Life Celebrations network.